Thursday, 20 April 2017

LETS TALK BLOGGING DRAMA



So today, I have sat down in front of my laptop and decided I needed to write something, but I just could not think what to write about. I am in a little bit of a blogging lull again I feel. Its so annoying. But then it occurred to me, that I could talk about blogging as it seems to be a huge topic of conversation in the social media world at the moment. I see other people writing about the pressure in blogging, how sometimes there is this expectation of bloggers we should all aspire to be like, and somehow we find ourselves thinking why we haven't got to that point yet? I don't know about any of you guys, but sometimes I am lying in bed on a night at about 10:30, setting my 5:45am alarm ready to get up for 1/3 12.5 hour shifts in the hospital and I scroll through my social media, and see some of my favourite bloggers saying how they are going to be jetting off elsewhere tomorrow, or have been to X amount of events in London or what not. It makes me feel slightly sad and jealous, I am not going to lye. Not jealous in a way that I do not want these people to have these opportunities, because that is definitely not the case, and in fact its only because I really feel like they are living the life I totally want to have! 

Don't get me wrong... I truly do love my career! I love it so much! It makes me feel so fulfilled every single day, to know I am literally saving lives every day. But sometimes my job is super hard both emotionally and physically, and sometimes I just wish that I could have a career which involved me focusing on other passions of mine! I never think for one moment my blog will ever get to the point that would mean I could do it as a full time thing, but if it did what decisions would I make? 



I think this dilemma for me, or these questions cross my mind because of the pressure of blogging at the moment, and because naturally as humans we all find ourselves thinking why we are not at the same point as someone else. I am only human at the end of the day, and sometimes I find myself getting mega frustrated that I am not moving somewhere or seeing results as fast as I would like. Or seeing that something I have worked super hard on, kind of flunk? I am a little bit of perfectionist myself, and when coming up with my own creative ideas I get so frustrated when something does not turn out EXACTLY how I want it to! Also, as you can imagine in my career as a nurse we get paid absolutely atrociously considering the responsibility, the hours and the physical and mental strains! I get so envious and have so many ideas of things I would love to be able to buy myself, and treat myself to as a reward for maybe something I have had to deal with at work which I maybe handled quite well and feel I deserve to treat myself because of. However, as mentioned my wage as a nurse basically only just covers the bare necessities and lately I have found that I have to cut back on spending my money on things I like and enjoy because the budget simply will not stretch. Sometimes I just find myself getting really down in the dumps about not being able to afford some of the more luxury pieces and products I see some other youtubers and bloggers getting their hands on. As I have said above, this is not in any way me saying that I feel these people do not deserve them - because I know for a fact that blogging is hard work, and takes up pretty much all of your time, so I think if you earn enough money to actually afford luxury items then that's amazing! What I am saying is, I get frustrated that I go to work, have a horrendously hard shift and then come home to my blogging world, and do more work at home, to then still not be able to afford a smidge of what some other people can. 

I dont personally feel like I expect too much by sometimes just thinking that my efforts should be a little bit more noticed, because I really do put 110% into everything I ever do. I am currently working a full time job as an intensive care nurse, doing a masters degree at uni and also a part time blogger as well as actually living a normal life like going to the gym, spending time with my family and friends and going about daily living - and sometimes I just wish there was a perk in there somewhere which makes me think AND THAT IS THE REASON WHY I DO EVERYTHING I DO



Some of my favourite ever things to read and watch are other bloggers and youtubers luxury hauls and bag un-boxings or what not, I just love them! However sometimes I do find myself thinking why cant that be me? and am I doing something wrong because I cant afford to go out and buy a new bag every month (or ever for that matter). I just feel like sometimes I personally lose sight of what is real life? and without offending anyone (because I really hope I don't do that) is real life, really going out and being able to buy yourself a luxury branded pair of shoes AND a handbag whenever you fancy? Maybe in some peoples world it is, but not in a lot of peoples! Sometimes I just feel like we lose touch of what reality really involves? It involves people just getting by, buying themselves a couple of pieces of clothing from Topshop when they can afford it, or having to wait until payday to be able to buy yourself a new foundation. Sometimes, blogging and social media just creates unrealistic desires that you too should be able to afford the things others can, when really it is not the case! 

As mentioned above, this is not me slating big youtubers or bloggers for being able to afford these things - why should you not mention them if you know you have worked hard for them? But this is just me stating that sometimes I personally feel as though I am missing out on something, that sometimes I feel I personally deserve to have, knowing how hard I work ALL THE TIME



And on another note actually, I feel this post is maybe a good time to have a chat about the instagram drama that kicked off over the last few days in the world of blogging. Firstly, I am only going to really briefly mention this because I try not to get too involved with the whole sha-bang! However, I wanted to get my perception across. 

I personally feel sad that blogging can sometimes be so dramatic and focused on outing others. I sometimes feel like some bloggers use their platforms or social media in general to out others and say comments to get people to like and feel like this justifies that whatever they want to say is completely ok. I am not meaning this about the comments that were made by one large blogger in particular over the weekend about how to expose those bloggers and instagrammers who are unfairly cheating their way up the ladder, but simply I am meaning that I have been a victim of someone personally attacking me via comments on twitter on a regular basis and personally, I think its quite unfair that people feel the need to use their social media to do so, just to feel like if they get a like or two, it means that what they are saying is completely ok. It is not ok. Everybody has their own blogging niche, and something in particular that they maybe like to focus on or write about more than something else, however obviously because the blogging world is pretty broad now and the community has grown lots, it means that there may be clashes of opinions and what not, but sometimes I think people just lose sight of the reason why they started in the first place. For me personally, it was all about being lonely between the time of finishing university and starting my new job, and the fact I had moved about 400 miles away from my family and friends and had nothing else to focus my time on - that's the reason why I started. And since then I have continued to grow and learn about lots of different bloggers, and every single day I am discovering something new or finding brand new people to follow. We each have our journeys, we each have our reasons why we are doing this, and so therefore sometimes I find the drama and negativity really really off putting, and just makes this industry look quite bitchy when really it does not need to be. Like I said, we all have our reasons, whatever they are - and every individual person needs to appreciate that instead of criticising or outing other people. 

Again, referring back to buying followers or what not. I do think its wrong and it cheats the system at the end of the day, and it really is quite disheartening as a genuine blogger trying to grow in this industry when bloggers who have clearly bought their followers or are using bots, are climbing their way up the ladder, getting incredible opportunities and working with insane brands. Its just not fair really because it shadows us smaller bloggers and makes us even less known and seen. I am actually personally pretty glad that this whole exposing people thing has come about, because it actually may open the eyes of some PR and brands, because this may mean that in the long run, the opportunities may be offered to some of us smaller bloggers, which lets be honest - is the right thing to do, if these people have been buying a following that is not even genuine. 

In summary. I love my blog. I love this side of my life. I keep myself to myself. I have made a good handful of really incredible friends because of it. I work with brands I have loved forever more. And I only ever tweet negatively as a reaction to someone else talking about me, never to out someone for no reason. 

Some rules for new bloggers. Don't out people on your social media, its not nice and makes you not look like a very nice person at the end of the day (only if you are doing it for the wrong reasons). Do not buy instagram followers or followers on any of your social media for that matter, you will be found out and brands and other bloggers will not trust you because of this. Try not to get too involved in the drama, yes have an opinion but just be cautious of who is reading, you could offend someone at the end of the day. 



Now I read back on this post I am actually so happy I took the time to write about blogging drama. Its something that in the past has really got me all down in the dumps and I wanted to express my opinion of recurrent and current drama going on in blogging and just to address some of my upsets about this community sometimes. I hope nothing I have written has offended anyone, because at the end of the day this is my opinion and my own personal journey. I hope one day I get to enjoy my blog even more than I do already, and continue to have the opportunity to work with some incredible brands. A goal of mine for 2017 is actually to meet some of the incredible bloggers I have chatted to online over the months/years. There is certainly a couple I have in mind, and I really want to make this happen!

What are your opinions of social media outing? Negativity? and the drama around instagram at the moment? 

Please do let me know in the comments below and let me know if you have found any other blog posts similar to this about the blogging community!

Much Love

Lauren
x
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1 comment

  1. I feel exactly the same Lauren! Sometime I don't think I am getting anywhere with blood/youtube. But I don't ever see myself giving up as I enjoy it so much :)
    Your content is amazing and I am walls reading/watching. G xx

    www.gemsblogstorey.com

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