Thursday, 21 April 2016

10 Simple Life Changing Tips


As some of you may know if you follow my twitter, youtube or whatnot that I am forever posting about how some of the changes I have made in 2016 have changed my life, quite literally. I am the kind of person who when I have an issue with something it pretty much takes over my entire life for whatever reason. I usually let myself be so unhappy about something that it effects everything I do and every single though process. I have tried to make some changes this year, and every single one I have made, truly has worked fantastically and I could not be happier about it! 

This is why I feel like I have got enough months of changes behind me in 2016 to offer some tips of advice to you all about how you too could effectively 'change your life' if you too are like me and let every single little thing control your happiness. And I will be honest, these miniature changes really have made me such a happier person and I want to share with you how I did it and how I recommend you guys do too!! 

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1. Establish a good group of friends around you

Quite a simple tip but one which to me, really is key to your happiness. I really do have an incredible group of friends around me, all of whom are there because I want them in my life and to be honest are all solid friends that I have been best friends since the moment I met them. I have what we call a 'family' of friends because it is a mixture of girls and boys and we all do everything together and are just so close as a group! From the beginning of my school life which is now 20 years ago (scary) I have been best friends with 3 ladies who are still the top 3 girls in my life - Rachael, Zoe & Ruth and I still cannot comprehend that our friendship is so strong its lasted this long. Yes we all argue and bicker at times but that is as far as it goes. Loads of people have come and gone over the years but us 4 have always stuck together and that is what matters to me. I am so grateful to have a little family of friends because we really are such a solid group and do so many fun things together including holidays, festivals etc! What more could you want than doing the most fun things with your best friends!? 

2. Learn to walk away from anything that does not make you happy

This is key to my happiness in 2016. I have walked away from many situations that were pretty much just making me ill throughout 2015. The thing is, I was dealing with people and situations who cannot and refuse to see the wrong in their doings and instead of trying to solve it they would just ignore me or pretend it is not happening or they would give me mixed messages about things being ok when really they weren't. My issue is, I think into things too much - so when I get even the smallest inkling that there is a problem I let it take over my life and it effects everything. My personality type is unfortunately a tricky one to grasp and deal with - a few years ago I am pretty sure I had undiagnosed depression and the traits of my personality sometimes revert back to that, when bad things happen and my mind is just locked in this unhappy place and its not good at all. In 2015 I was hurt so badly by people that I cannot comprehend and they are people who I was either close to, or people who were a big part of my life. It was a learning curve being hurt by people who should not hurt you, because now I am happier than ever and its either because I have moved on with my life, either cutting them off entirely or learning to not care or get involved with what they do anymore. I am not saying I have done this to punish anybody, but for my own happiness it has truly worked and I feel so much healthier for doing so. Realising that situations can cause me to feel so low at times, I know that making these decisions has been life changing, and maybe one day, things will be different all over again. 

3. Make plans and have things to look forward to

A key to my happiness is certainly making a long list of plans throughout the year which I can count down the weeks, or days to. The nature of my day job (nursing for those of you who do not know) is very demanding both physically and mentally and so therefore to prevent any form of burnout I think its super important to have time off and plans that involve more than lie ins and watching day time TV. This is why I look forward to things such as Creamfields Festival in the Summer, booking holidays, weekends away, nights out with my best friends, fun days out with friends, date days or nights with my boyfriends, quality time with my family or even just travelling up North to spend time away from Sheffield with my family. I think its important for everyone to have plans in the bag to look forward to, because although it may not be your job which is physically demanding - it might be something else which you feel you need to just take a break from every so often and you can do this by doing fun things with your friends or loved ones as a little distraction from what is bothering you at the moment. If there is ever a time that I do not have a long list of things to look forward to then I can guarantee I will be on the internet looking for deals for weekends away, or frantically sending messages to my friends making fun plans such as trampolining dates etc! 

4. Prioritise your spending

I had to include a money related tip into this because lets be honest, it is kind of important and if you want to take part in fun and social things then you need to be sure that you have sorted out all of the boring stuff first. A key tip to being happy is sorting out your funds, money stresses are some of the worst and you don't really want to go without doing the fun things because you are simply incapable of spending your money on the correct things first. So, I sometimes think I am a little bit of a hypocrite when it comes to talking about money because I am so bad at saving it, but then I sit back and think - well actually yes I might be bad at saving but every single month I pay everything I need to on the day I get paid which includes my rent, bills, insurance etc and therefore I know that the money I have left after the important stuff is mine to do with as I please. I think its extremely important to put money aside for all of your commitments the moment it comes into your bank and following this you can feel so much happier knowing that what is in your bank is yours to make exciting plans with or spend on things which make you happy. I have recently taking to making a little list on my phone of the big things I am going to put money towards each month (this is definitely the OCD in me creeping out as I am so organised all of the time) but currently on my phone I have each month and then a little plan and pointer of what I need to pay for or attempt to save for each month, so in example I have written for this month I will be paying for the lodge for my Mums wedding next month & Lanzarote. Organising your spending and funds could be the answer to your happiness to, if you find it to be something which really does get you down. 

5. Do a job that you enjoy

Definitely a very important tip to your happiness!! When I hear people are sad or unhappy in their jobs it truly makes me really sad, you have no reason to be unhappy in your job whatsoever and usually it is not that hard to change it. Yes changing jobs can involve a lot of stress and fuss but if you are unhappy in your job then you really ought to do something about it. I can honestly say that although my job is not always the most positive place and doesn't leave me coming home with a huge smile on my face all of the time (for obvious reasons) I can honestly say that I really do love my job and it was definitely the right career path for me. I go to work now and my brain works like it should, and as a critical care nurse I find I have the opportunity to make some serious decisions all of the time and I am able to be rather autonomous which I love!! Although I am miserable as sin when I wake up on a morning to go to work (purely because I hate mornings) I really do enjoy my job and definitely feel that it is important for everyone to either be happy in their job or at least not miserable at work!! Therefore, if you feel unhappy in your job - consider your options and changing it or at least figure out what it is that is making you unhappy and consider changing that?


6. Be comfortable in your own skin

I do think feeling good about yourself is a top tip for being happier. I know I always feel better when I have my make up on, hair done and in a good outfit. Right now I am sitting here writing this in my pjs, dressing gown, no make up (and terrible skin at the moment), and greasy hair - I look a picture honestly. And I am sitting here knowing that as soon as this post is written I can go and have a shower and make myself look presentable - I know when I have done that I will feel so much better! For me its about making myself look and subsequently feel better with my make up on and hair done, but for some of you it might be that going to the gym and working out might be what makes you feel better. My body is not really a huge focus of mine, I am quite lazy and find that whenever I join a gym I go once and then stop going so this is not really my place of focus. However if this is something which you do which makes you physically feel better than do it!! Do whatever makes you feel more comfortable and this will make you happier, honestly! 

7. Don't hold grudges (Something I am currently working on)

As you can see from above, yes this is something which is quite new to me and I am trying to work on. I am terrible with never forgiving and never forgetting, and I know that this is something I need to work on to progress in relationships with people and move on which is why I am making changes myself. I sometimes think that if you see changes in the future occurring then you need to think and act now for this potentially happening. To be honest, if you are thinking about the future then obviously you want it to happen so why not make small baby steps to it. Reply to someone when they message you, like their facebook post, send them well wishes - just small things like this could make such a big difference to something progressing. I am not saying that this is a 'life changing' tip but feeling like there is less animosity in a situation has to be better than feeling like you completely need to avoid and ignore everything someone does, right?

8. Only do things which make you comfortable

I have always been quite good at saying no to things which I do not feel comfortable doing, and now at the age of 23 I do not feel that this is something I have an issue with any more. However, some of you who are maybe still at school, college or university and have groups of people surrounding you wanting you to do things more often, might have this problem still. All I can say is, never give in to peer pressure - I have to hand on heart say that this is something which I never did at school or throughout any period of my life so far to be honest. I have always been quite strong viewed and no what is right and wrong and know what is good for me and what is not. So I never jumped on the smoking hype, drinking extremely under-age hype, being naughty in school just to please your friends - and this did me so many favours. This to me is definitely a life changing tip, because you will probably look back in a few years on some of the decisions you made and they may still be effecting your life now, or you may just want to hang your head in shame or have huge regret for what you did. So basically, if you start smoking because of peer pressure I really would not bother, its bad for you, its not cool, and I can promise you when you get to about my age you will regret ever starting it and will be trying everything in your power to stop. So basically my advice is, simply do not bother doing it - it might not effect your life now, but in a few years when you are trying to stop - it will effect your life and why not save yourself the trouble now?

Right now, I kind of have learnt not to put myself into situations which make me uncomfortable. Instead I avoid anything I do not feel comfortable in, and this has made me such a happier person!! 

9. Praise or treat yourself every now and then

Following on from the tip above about prioritising your spending, I really do think its super important to treat yourselves every now and then with something which you love. Especially if you work hard - I don't see why you should not be able to treat yourselves every now and then. We all know that when a little package comes through your door it puts a huge smile on your face - simple but effective!!

10. Learn to enjoy your own company

If you spend a lot of time alone then this may be something which you will be used to, but I definitely do find that enjoying your own company is something which is key to making you a happier person. Its important to learn to feel happy when you are alone and get rid of all of those feelings of being lonely. Throughout life, you are pretty much guaranteed that you will spend a lot of time alone and you need to learn to feel ok whilst you are by yourself and not miserable. This could be to get a hobby, read a book, do something which makes you happy whilst you are by yourself. I know since I started my blogging, I am never negative when I am alone because my mind is always so focussed on my blog or my youtube that I do not think about anything else. If you do not have a focus when you are alone then this can sometimes result in a little thing we all hate called overthinking. Therefore my recommendation to enjoying your own company is doing something which you enjoy in this time - so for me its blogging, filming, having a bath, cooking, watching tv, going for walks etc. I can pretty much 100% guarantee that if you learn to enjoy being by yourself then this is something that can change your life. 


I hope you have all enjoyed reading this post and found some beneficial tips which you can use yourselves to changes your own lives. If not, then I hope you did not mind too much about reading about mine. My life has changed so much for the better in 2016 and now you know why and how I have done it, and also how I am continuing to make changes!! 

Let myself and anyone reading this know any more tips you might have in the comments below. Also guys, don't forget to go over to my youtube and subscribe over there, I am always having personal chats with you guys on my weekly vlogs!! Click here to head over and subscribe.

Much Love

Lauren
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1 comment

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